A strange sense of nostalgia grips me today, maybe because i compare the Diwali celebrations of last year and this year or don't know why but the lanes i passed by and the people i met have surprising remained an integral part of my life considering my penchant for forgetting things and people once i decide or time decides that their chapter is over in my life.
June 2013 to June 2014 should definitely be called the most challenging and the most defining stage of my life. Joining back pieces is never easy especially when dreams go un-fulfilled in spite of your efforts, old bonds break, trust shatters and all you are left with are some blank stares into the sky and endless questions for which nobody has any answers.The good teaches you to be good but the bad un-willingly turns you into a cynic, unsure of everybody and everything around.
Desperate times call for desperate actions. Never would i have imagined that i would move out of the comforts of my home to a land where i knew nobody and which i can safely say is like my second home today. The first few days were hell, not knowing where to go, almost getting kidnapped and looted to not finding a place to stay, but i still continued for all all i knew was that this place might just give me a new perspective and reasons as to why humans (more specifically me) should be social animals for we swallow ourselves into a world of manipulation, pretence and this make belief world of do good'ers.
Finding a home in Delhi became a little easier gradually with the help from one of my sir's from college Mr Aqueel Ahmed, then the next just followed staying on the top floor with no security, fear of darkness engulfing you inside and outside, the feeling of '' can i run back home a coward'' and can i adjust in this place. Life gradually became easier with the my landlords becoming my extended family. The boy who trust not his own shadow slowly started trusting people again, not because he had no choice but because living in the past was like letting his life play like a stuck gramophone. A strange sense of opening up, now the city felt my own for i went about any and everywhere i could with the time constraints i had, the people seemed my own, relations looked more than just a baggage and a label.
The sleeping on the terrace counting stars, the late night walks with uncle (Mr Rajesh Malhotra) and daadi (Mrs Kiran Malhotra) on the terrace became fun as we spoke anything and everything under the sun and made it look as if i was being taken care of and maybe somewhere up there, there was that fictional character suddenly rooting for me. (nobody knows the relief it was for my parents that their well bought up brahmin kid had returned to his roots foregoing his atheistic days).Conversations and shopping became more fun thanks to aunty (Mrs. Bharti Malhotra) for i had never encountered any family other than my own who cared so much for my well being (right from my health scares taking me to doctors, to taking care of my food and taking care of my every whim and fancy).The conversations just flowed, the movies, the dinner times, the T.V discussion times, the AAP debate times and all the gossip mongering we did still remains so fresh.
I still dont have the answers why i was taken care like their own and what purpose have i served in their lives but all i know is i carry with me a new perspective (not a drastic change but yes a change definitely) and a sense of gratefulness for all that they have done for it was no easier handing a nut / a case (in language of my dad) like me.The trip and these people taught me certain things that i will always cherish '' it's not the big things that make one happy, its a combination of those small little things '', '' how to deal with a situation'', '' how to be giving '' and most important of them all i value every second i get to spend with my family rather than wiling away my time in dinners at fancy restaurants, movies or with people who never were and are a part of my life because '' relations stay only when both the parties involved are willing to contribute '' letting go off so many old friends without feeling bitter and these temptations was never easy but nevertheless what's life without a little bit of sacrifice and especially when its actually doing you a world of good. My good bye actually reinforced the belief in the age old saying '' jo hota hey woh acche ke liye hota hey ''.
Wonder why i write this today that too after an year has passed, maybe because i still love all these people and this is my way of ensuring that they stay in my head for as long as i breathe. More to such people and more to genuineness in this world and for all those wondering whatever happened to masaledaar writing that i always write, keep waiting, there's more in store considering i want to write more often now on everything strictly controversial :P hahah ...
