Firstly before I start writing anything let me
clarify I am supposedly an INDIAN (what a relief to fit into a category of
normal people) and secondly i am too much of north indian in south india and
too much of a south indian in north india (so much so that i can become a
enlightened saint) and more clarity on this would confuse the shit out of you,
so i think its evident that i am a confused indian if i may say so.. :P and
thirdly all the jokes cracked at anybody mean no offense (like i care :P).
DELHI as the name suggests is the capital of the country (bazooka what
intelligence) and hence for a fact is a melting pot of cultures (both civilized
and un-civilized ) and ofcourse not to forget people like me who are so
absorbed in their own world of wierdness, so here goes my take on this
historically beautiful city.
Well the very first day i stepped into this place i was sure if I had to
survive in a place like this i would have to become a rahul baba or a modi deva
or worse become a BABU asap (the govt
potbelly types and the palatial houses these dolts get for doing nothing ) and
then the '' Tota syndrome '' and all the euphoria about the south indian dark
choclate boys dying for the white choclate girls (how stereotypical) i thought
for a second and then BAM it's true, more than the north indians having delhi
girl-friends it's the southies who take their place here in terms of despo'ness
and the actual wooing rate also ( the law of opposites attract proved correct )
and for somebody as wierd as me and for whom food or even better a cook is far
more than important than having a Gf to nag, i realized yes for a mattter of
fact the women are pretty but that does'nt take away the fact that delhi has a
lot of make-up stores: P hahah and then the horror of the worst order, let’s
put it this way a majority of their talk can put you into coma and cause
irreversible damage.
Now coming to our darling idly sambar people as we are or
should i put it as '' they '' are addressed, it's surprising that we (being so
diplomatic :P) come to delhi and start craving for the typical ''south indian
food'' and i am like don't u get it !! this is delhi, can't you just stop
cribbing and get some roti, paneer tikka or even better a paneer biryani and
then the second barrier as if the stereo typing was not enough we would always
love to hang around with people from our very often distorted cultures and
refuse to embrace the new things the other place might teach (not the
controversial stuff though ) for one i just loved the way these people loved
their life, live it their way or even a better term just don't give a damn and
when i compare them to the nosy and interfering neighbours i had down south and
not to forget those always scandal seeking eyes on the lookout for fresh gossip
especially from poor people like me .. :P ahahah .. who is so sane, quiet and
so southalicious and then my god the groups the idly sambhar group, the vada
paav group, the delhi group, the namma banglore group and yes our very own
pawan kalyan / pulli dance group and mind u all the above mentioned names were
to offend and the strangest part no group interacts with the other more than
the hai hello and that ohh so pearly fake smile.
Now the assumptions part, south indians think north indians are
commercial, loud and snobbish ( ohh really ) and the north indians see the
south indians as typical lungi dance people ( imagination skills of oneself can
be a horror at times ) who are shy ( roflmao, joke of the century ), reserved
and yes ohh so fearing karma our darling bitch and eat grass (
non-vegans, poor ppl they don't know veg also is fun and i risk no more opinion
on food ) and then the habits part i mean seriously what's with this thing that
south indians get up early, i mean yes we do but we also are lazy bears at
times and then my god the puja .. :P i mean what's wrong in chanting that poor
souls name who sits somewhere up ( if he does ) and suddenly before u realize,
doing puja :P i mean the aarti and all that ( not the perverse interpretation )
apparently makes u so south indian, god, my ancestors must be turning in their
graves out of shock when people call me spiritual or far worse religious and
not to mention the ego - massage i get after all from being an outcast rebel in
your own karma bhoomi (all pun intended) to suddenly owning up the southie tag,
it's a priceless feeling i tell you .
Lastly for somebody
like me for whom tracing my own descent and loyalty is as confusing as why was
i put on earth for heaven’s sake.. :P the simple answer to this jigsaw puzzle
would be absorb a part of this culture and make my own (the one that i dnt know of) more complicated
and in the midst of all this study, become a babu fast and have fun :) Now the
last thing why the hell did i write this holy sermon, answer - because i was so
bored that i wanted ppl spamming this post with their highly volatile comments
on this and provide me with some masaale-daar
entertainment, so thanks for wasting your time on this prettily packed shit ..
:P
