2012: How i wish the world ended

Never understood the midnight madness that is usually associated with the NEW year's eve,  sleepy new years are the best ways for an early bird like me who is always waiting to crash-land into my bed, well time flies and our darling doomsday year is coming to an end. It wouldn't be wrong to tell that this year has been one hell of a journey.

       This year should should also be rightly called the year of emotional turmoil, sinusoidal depressions and un-answered questions and the blank stares into the wide sky with a question WHY ? Never have i felt so strong and yet so vulnerable, so sure and yet so insecure. This year can also be called the year of heartbreak's, heart-ache's, betrayals, controversies following like a shadow and i landing myself in one mess after another. 

 

          Firstly the win at the HINDU E-PLUS club challenge followed by the college vizag trip that involved a lot of drama, tears, fights, heated emotions and well a lot of problems coming to the forefront, nothing is more problematic than seeing your own side that is not in exact terms flattering, well we lost the finale but nevertheless it ended up teaching me a lot of things by exposing me to the demons inside.

         This was again followed up by a drama that involved trust, love, concern and genuineness, all of which in this world sadly come with an expiry date and then followed a series of un-answerable questions, never ending depressions making me look like a joker in a bunch of seriously humane world of affairs (all pun intended) and i am pretty sure i made a good chutney of my emotions all through the year producing had it been collected at one place a river of tears, because when u break into so many pieces, it's hard to gather yourself back and tell the world, screw you, but u survive only when u get up and show the world u have the balls to face what it takes to get where you want and what u want and that you are not scared of taking the tough decisions and proudly without any modesty i can tell i have evolved to be a little more comfortable in my own skin.

          Decisions well like i believe there are no good or bad decisions, all the hard decisions and the decisions that were accompanied by a sense of emptiness and blank stares into the sky now seem valid because at the end of day I am the ONLY person who is responsible for whatever, so no regrets and they have made me what i am today though not flattering but still am not that bad either, and 2012 has ended up teaching me lessons the hard way with all it's mighty highs and morbid low's. 

                 Lastly Dear 2012, thank you for completely breaking me into pieces which i still gather and tend to with care, hoping it heals someday, Dear 2013 - U shall have the privilege of being '' THE MOST VALUABLE YEAR '' of my life and yes again it will be a sleepy 31 december 2012 and wishing u all  a kind, benevolent, successful, happy year 2013  ahead . 

       

GOD in a never defined fish MARKET.

Never has a question puzzled the greatest minds like the question of god and the mockery that surrounds this institution. It's also surprising that it has actually turned into a concept with every one having their own say on it and going around prophecy'ing their own versions to the world.

      Firstly there are those who tell god can be seen even in the smallest of things, human beings to be more precise, when anybody is not perfect why stoop god also (if he exists) to one's level for i am sure no scripture tells please confess your faith in god, owing to one's own insecurities or to cover for the weak'ish and confident nature in which we cover up our faults begging for forgiveness.

      Second in this bunch of craziness are the ones who believe god is supreme, ohh really !! then why is there such grave injustice in the world, telling everything happens for a reason is like killing somebody and telling them i was just releasing u off the pain and sending u to higher planes.The irony is we value anything that is a not a virtue more than god himself and then continue our existence in the make-belief world of a HIGHER POWER while we are just plain BLIND to the immediate surroundings around us unable to respond even to the LOWEST powers that should govern us.

     Thirdly are those who are so freakish about god and godliness that i am sure (if he exists) he also runs scared looking at the shallowness with which they go about their own daily lives ACTING HIGHLY MORALISTIC and PIOUS (pun intended) thinking god (if he exists) is a blind nomad. Running their own versions of god, godliness has become a venture slowly transforming from expressing the IN-EXPRESSIBLE to DRAMATIZING the IN-EXPRESSIBLE for the consumption of the public psyche.

     It also won't be a shocker to tell that god should now be made an active share holder in the various activities that go-on on his name, like a famous joke- beards and orange clothes are the sensation in india because inherently man loves knowing what is never KNOWN by ANYBODY.

   Lastly there are those who want everyone to believe that god is something that is to be felt, how sad science never gave a concept called god his due credit (all pun intended) for he must have been a part of one of the senses that a man could sense and then there are those who provide FACTS (self made) explaining everything on the basis of science and to their own convenience which again falls short of  human values in a cover up bid to dis-lodge the doubts that languish in a person's head by closing his eyes and then there are those for whom god is like an un-defined relation that still lingers in their lives thanx to their immediate surroundings. 

    Pitying these concepts/ belief's/dis-belief's is like arguing like an idiot thinking the population that LOVES god will actually listen. 

      Sarcatically like i always believe this world is a circus with it's own set of clowns around, so be a clown and have fun or just see the tamasha around and have fun because anyways nobody get's out alive and KARMA well it can go on a holiday because attributing one's life to karma is like attributing a gun in one's own head designed to shoot oneself.